Tarot Card Challenge: Day 2

Tarot Card Challenge: Day 2. Found at lionharts on Instagram.

“Today you can draw a minimum of two cards, one in theme of what you should release and one in theme of something positive to focus on.“

Knight of Pentacles, Reversed. Release.

“The Knight of Pentacles reversed is about feeling stuck in a routine and a repetitive pattern of behaviour.”

“The reversed Knight of Pentacles can carry a warning that this is an important time to keep your focus squarely on your work, if you are working for money. This is a time to be as adult as possible, if you want to be successful.”

Damn. Yep. Spot on. Feeling stuck focusing on work and being adult. I need to release this fear. The past month was filled with ups and downs and all arounds. Worry about work. Stability. Needing more. Worried that my husband needed to find something more, stable. One of us needed to secure something secure to move ahead. All the worry and here we are in the same exact place as we started. I need to let go and trust my soul. All the roads not traveled are not traveled for a reason. I’m on the right path. I need to trust this and release all the other nonsense.

The Empress. Something positive to focus on.

“The Empress augurs a need for us to listen to our intuition, and to give priority to our emotions an passions. She can signify coming abundance. Let your ‘inner voice’ guide you in how you operate. The empress directs us to follow our bliss, and that the rest will follow.”

“The Empress may represent the birth of a new idea, a product, or a new way of being. New ideas and projects will be implemented resulting in the success of all your projects and interests. Bring forth those ideas that have been growing and developing inside of you.”

And this is exactly what I’m saying. Positive. What I need to focus on. Listening to my intuition. Following my bliss and the rest will follow. It’s almost like I pulled these two cards together for a higher purpose, a great reminder to just trust myself. I’m on the right path.

Tarot Card Challenge: Day 1

Tarot Card Challenge: Day 1. Found at lionharts on Instagram.

“In the most simple way you can stick with shuffling your deck while thinking about your new beginning as you draw a card. What will be my new beginning?”

When the Sun card shows for you, it’s a sign that soon you are likely to find yourself feeling more free than you have in a while – maybe years. 

The Sun represents success, radiance and abundance. The Sun gives you strength and tells you that no matter where you go or what you do, your positive and radiant energy will follow you and will bring you happiness and joy.

The Sun. New beginning.

Here comes the SUN! What a great first card for the New Year – especially since 2017 was a complete bust. 

I got this.

Dredging Along

I know that most of this post is coming from my mood. I dislike the muggy warm weather so much. AND the darn internet is slow as molasses today at home.

That said, every other week or so I get really upset and frustrated over my decision to go into real estate. Sometimes this is brought on by HWMMS sometimes myself. Today, not sure where it came from other then the fact that yesterday, HWMMS once again said “I should probably try to sell the Challenger” Sigh.

I haven’t blogged about this yet but when I was in a seminar around “THE ONE THING” through the brokerage I’m a part of, I realized I didn’t really have a ONE THING that was working towards when starting and moving forward with my real estate career, well, nothing specific. Having enough money to make a living isn’t a specific thing. IN CAME THE WORDS “I want to make sure HWMMS never has to sell his Challenger.”

I guess that’s my ONE THING. Making sure my husband can keep his mistress. 🙂 Which really means, giving back to him the ability to continue to live the life we have together over the past few years. I have  A LONG WAY TO GO to get to that point though, real estate wise. Then again, I’m a year and a half into this career with all buyers I’m working with in one of the tightest markets for buyers in WNY. Great timing.

So…today I was frustrated again. I noticed a friend who asked me about real estate last year, just bought a house. I know she was getting ready to look and she wanted information on maybe buying the double she was currently living in at the time. I gave her my mortgage guy and encouraged her first steps….

And then a year later she bought a house. This also happened with another person from Roller Derby. She asked me questions, I helped, ish and didn’t follow up. She bought a house, with an agent she wasn’t even fond of and asked me questions during the process.

BOTH of these people I could have helped. I should have helped. I thought I was sort of helping? But no. I’m not even a little bit assertive in this regard.

And sure there are a million agents out there, even a thousand good ones…I can’t possibly be offended or take these things personally. But today, I did, for just a moment.

I sat for a few, feeling defeated. Wondering if I should get out while, well, not ahead…even though HWMMS and I talked about it and decided I was renewing my license and giving it another 2 years. The first years are tough. And it’s not that I’m not working with people and building relationships…but the money, well, the money hasn’t followed. YET.

I NEED TO BE MORE AGGRESSIVE (yikes, interestingly enough, this statement came from my fingers through automatic writing just now, it wasn’t the train of thought I was heading for…)

In a moment of trying to figure it out. Thinking “give it up” was the way I should go, I pulled a card—-THREE OF WANDS.

Not even a little bit, give it up. In fact, polar opposite and exactly the message I get every, single time I think about my future with real estate (which is annoying, but comforting at the same time.)

From Psychic Revelation:

Introduction: When the 3 of Wands appears, you are likely to find that your finances are going much better, in fact this can be the month that your proverbial ship has come in…You may be finally experiencing some important success after you’ve been through some difficulty.

General: In general the 3 of Wands refers to work, in an extremely positive way. Give yourself some credit.

Work: When the 3 of Wands appears in the context of work, it tells us that you have a lot to be proud of regarding your work performance, even if you haven’t quite seen the rewards you would expect from this yet.

Finances: Things are looking up financially. Your hard work is already in the process of being rewarded whether you see evidence of this yet or not. You may do better financially than you had ever dreamed.

Every. Single. Time. I doubt Real Estate, I’m reminded of this same message. I don’t believe this is a coincidence. I was led to this path for a reason, I would like to believe the reason is to provide a living for my family that also enables a flexible schedule…for whatever may come next (foster children? adoption?)

Yep.

My mood lifted a little after seeing this message, again. AND THEN MY FRIEND TEXTED ME saying she was not working out of town this week, but would be working from home and wanted to know if I had time to meet—to talk about her looking for a house.

Within minutes.

I’m listening…

Fear of the Spotlight

So I was talking to a few friends last week about my hesitancy to stand up and give messages in public.  I am not one that enjoys the spotlight and I have the most incredible critic that just loves to tell me that I am not worthy of said spotlight.  You want to know who that critic is….ME.  I constantly hear my mothers voice in my head telling me:

“It doesn’t matter what you look like cause no ones looking at you anyway.”

Thanks mom for raising me to be a confident woman!  The thought of putting myself in a position that people ARE looking at me makes my heart race and I just want to hide.  I know that public speaking is number one on the list of things that people have a fear of so I am not alone in that respect….still doesn’t make it any easier though or less intimidating.  Needless to say I am finally gaining more and more confidence with regard to standing in front of a crowd of people and sharing my thoughts…so I may be finally conquering that fear…finally.

I know I “blame” mom for the cruel words she used in my most formidable years and I was just asked to think when I am grumbling about my childhood…what was my mother’s childhood like.  I know it was a tough one and she probably heard that growing up as well, or some version of that.

My parents both came from monetarily poor families but I believe that they were both rich in love and the importance of family.  I know my grandparents, whether they were just called grandma and grandpa or just felt like that to me because of our relationship, loved my siblings and I very very much and I know the time that we spent with them throughout our lives was filled with much love and laughter.

I believe one of the lessons that I came into this life to learn was to change the view that I had as to what love, family and relationship looked like.  I know there are a lot of other lessons that I choose to learn and I am working hard at figuring them out.

What are some of the lessons that you came into the life to learn…..

Barnes & Noble

I took my mom to Barnes & Noble today. While on my way there, I thought about looking at the tarot card options they have for sale, the last time I was there I browse right past. Maybe I would check them out today. While mom was at another part of the store I was over in the spiritual area and I picked up a book or two and once again, skimmed over the shelf with the cards. I don’t know if it is an embarrassment thing or I just didn’t really want to thing or what but I didn’t think about it, I didn’t have the money to buy today anyhow.

Mom is over in the cookbook section and she is looking for a certain book called The Chew? We can’t find it but I say I will go back over to look for her, even though she tells me never mind.  I head over to the computer to search and a sales clerk asks right before I get there if I need help finding anything, I ALMOST say yes, but then just decide to use the computer (the people who were on it right before me just left…)

I enter the search and I look to my left to find a completely random box of TAROT CARDS sitting there left by someone. REALLY? Yes, really.

Mystical Cats Tarot

I’ll have to examine this deck further…especially since I went to take a photo of these cards and this article popped up on my phone (I had a few of them unread last night I didn’t now they were still floating around.)

Ok, I’m listening!

ALSO while at Barnes and Noble I was cashing out at the cafe and I couldn’t find my debit card. I sort of got in a wee panic, there was a line behind me and I know it was in my purse, my wallet, where did it go? I checked my wallet one more time and pulled out a card, which wasn’t my debit card BUT it was a Barnes and Noble gift card I had from Christmas which I COMPLETELY forgot about. Turns out the card had $6 left on it. WOO! And then after I found that card by accident, the debit card appeared in the purse, where I swear I looked.